Something That We All Want Anyway

As the meme proposal played in the background at Tim and Aud’s wedding, my high school buddy Marcus turned to Chee Kiang and said, “This Tim ar, spoil market for all of us man! After this, girls want a better and bigger proposal and must have video lah, must be viral lah, must have pictures lah! I think I need to have like a video camera strapped to my forehead to record every moment already to top that!” Though amusingly frustrated, he said it in such a good natured way that it just sums up the playful prodding that goes on between couples in long term relationships. In their mid to late twenties I might add. Ahem. Don’t lie. You and I, we are one of those couples.

The gorgeous deco at Tim and Aud’s wedding. 🙂

Observing the way Marcus lovingly, indirectly teased his girlfriend Stacy with the above statement, it resonates in so many of us long term couples who are constantly being mindfucked by all these awesome proposals and facebook announcements complete with blings. We can’t help but wonder for ourselves the lure of this last stage of the game before we settle down to become a proper family.

To a certain extend it is peer pressure, but mostly it is a reminder that your time is coming, for both the girl and the guy. You know it’s coming but you continue the pretense of not expecting and not thinking. Though I am guilty of shaking his shoulders screeching, “WHEEeeennnn my TurnnnnnnnnN!!!!” whenever a new facebook engagement announcement pops up. *shy*

Traditionally, there are certain things that girls will expect their guys to do for them. A proposal that comes with a ring. A grand declaration of love. 🙂 So many girls out there like to claim that they are not like the next girl but deep down we all are. We might break a little at the thought of the amount spent on a piece of jewelry but we bite our lips and close our eyes and just be thankful that there is actually someone in this world who thinks you are worthy of a diamond ring.

A close friend was so practical that she even went ring shopping for her own engagement ring! She gave the ring back to her boyfriend and told him to surprise her when he felt like the time was right. “And when he did…..it was magical.” she gushed. The two of them are proof that you can make it special even if you know it is coming.

I’ve always had this impression that if you talk about it, think about it, nag about it or even lust after it, a marriage proposal might come off as being fake, a little too staged in fact. It’s probably one of the most awkward times in your life…even more so when you have been with this person for SO long! It is inevitable. But to think about when that moment would come, why should it even come? Don’t you already know the answer? Why do you even have to ask?! Get up! Get up!! Shy only!!

Often times the girls are made to look like we desperately want to get hitched and the guys running for their lives at the mere whiff of marriage plans. I initially got stuck writing this blog post. I was out of it for so long that I just didn’t know if what I wrote would ever make sense like how it once did. I told Chee Kiang to go to bed first because I *think* I might want to write something.

“Blog?!?” his eyes wide opened. I haven’t touched my blog for over six months.

“NO. It can be anything. A facebook note.. an article for a website somewhere … something.. YOU GO TO SLEEP LA. Don’t kepo.” I paiseh-ed, shy because I always told him that I’m so done with writing here. But sometimes when the inspiration to sit down and tap away at the keyboard hits you, I find myself back here. 🙂

He said he woke up this morning, turned on his iPad and found nothing on my blog. “You said you wanted to write one! About what leh! Tell!”

I didn’t want to tell him because it sounded silly but I slowly let him in on it and surprisingly he had his two cents too. He acknowledges that guys are bombarded by peer pressure and have a one step back approach when it comes to proposals, weddings and the whole shebang. Girls are always already knee deep in wedding preparation before the guy has even proposed. (You should see my pinterest boards. .____________. Not proud of it, but the wedding ideas are so pretty!!)

He believes that a proposal can be genuine and special even though the couple has been together for a very long time and are living together. I mean, that was my question to him, like wouldn’t it be weird for couples like us? You are practically family and on some days, squabbling like brother and sister because of the close proximity. It does seem like an entire show and dance that you know you don’t really need to act out and that it should just be about the two of you. But with a dash of guilt thrown in, you know that you want it to be the most unique one that will be the game changer. The next benchmark!

A super sweet proposal that would make anyone tear is every girl’s dream. We love creativity and effort. It’s the same concept as the one we wanted you to apply when it was your turn to surprise us with sweet homemade valentine’s day gifts when we first started dating. Make it something unique, something us.

And lastly, don’t forget to get it down on video. 😉

Butter Cookies For Christmas!

Here is my second attempt at making butter cookies! I wanted to decorate cookies for the longest time so what better time to do it then for Christmas?

Sugarbelle from The Sweet Adventures of Sugar Belle is such an inspiration!  She has this trademark way of decorating her cookies where she floods the design and outlines it with a harder icing consistency once the first layer is totally dried. I thought I’d give it a try.

With the aid of the holiday cookie cutters from my big box of Wilton cookie cutters, I came up with these:


Who knew making these cookies would take so many days!!

I prepared the batter on Tuesday night and it was already midnight when I was done, not possible for me to cut out the cookies and start baking!

Wednesday was cookie baking night and Thursday was decorating night (after the cookies have cooled). I used royal icing to decorate my cookies and managed to not get it too sickeningly sweet by adding two tablespoonfuls of lemon juice. For my royal icing, I used meringue powder instead of egg whites as it is just gross since the icing doesn’t actually get cooked so meringue powder works just as well!


So here comes the exciting part!! Decorating! I planned ahead what designs I wanted to use so out came the ipad and Sketchpro! 😀


A rough sketch!


Santa! The peachy orange was quite a challenge to make.


Time for the greens.


Couldn’t be bothered to make the holly at the corner of the stocking as per the sketching.


Green icing for the wreath.


After completing all designs which required green, red and white.

With my ipad as guidance.


One teddy in the making!


The final product!

Close up of each and every design:


Mr. Gingerbread Man… with bit of the eye lost.


The Low Profile Snowman. (with tipped hat)


Christmas wreath…abit cacat. 😛


Santa Blue Eyes.


Mrs. Gingerbread in a Santarina Outfit.


One of the more successful looking cookie…the christmas tree!


The stocking!


Cacat Candycane!


Another cacat  ornament.


Supposed to be a snowflake. *hides face* Now it’s a whimsical star.


Christmas Bell.. looked better in the sketching.


Teddy Christmas


The whole family of cookies! <3
I packed each and everyone of it into individual plastic bags and used my hair straightening iron to seal the bags. I strung a string around each bag and made them into ornaments for our christmas tree!

Voila!!

I can’t stop staring at the cookies whenever I pass by the tree. 🙂 🙂 🙂

Merry Christmas everyone!!! Hope you guys had delicious treats this holiday too!

Abercrombie and Fitch Topless Greeters – Ticked Off My Bucket List!

I knew I had to do this or die never knowing what it is like to stand next to one.

Random christmas deco in Singapore! As always, so gorgeous!


The crowd that thronged outside Abercrombie and Fitch where the sensational male models were posing for photographs!


I’ve been seeing them all over Facebook and no way in hell can I be so close to Singapore and not pop in to cop a feel, have a look.


You would think that it is super hard to get up close to take photos with the models but there’s actually a wall of very shy girls who somehow managed to get to the front of the line but were quite shy to finish the deed and go.


See! They were waiting! And they were also beckoning girls to come join them! 😀 And they made sure to remind you to come for the opening whenever you strike up a conversation.


Whee!! So many grouped together for us!!


This guy was going around taking topless pics with the models too..hahaha Okay lah, boleh lah I see some pectoral outlines there.


LOL Chee Kiang sent this to one of our gay buddies on whatsapp with the caption, “Merry Christmas!”. Hope our friend managed to find time to go check out the boys before their stint is over.


Hahahaha.. this guy so cute and shy. Aww.


Eng Hooi and I went around handpicking our favourites..hahaha!!


In most photos all over the internet, he has a smoldering look going on but mannn.. he has such a nice and genuine smile!!


In this photo, Weng Lum commented that I had very polite hands and that they should have travelled elsewhere. LOL!! Don’t want the guys to be disgusted and sue me for sexual harrassment!


And finally a picture with our lovely boys who encouraged us to catch the A&F boys before it is too late. We have such awesome boyfriends who will actually say things like, “Eh better faster, you want to go see your Abercrombie and Fitch models right? Let’s go! Let’s go!” and played cameramen while we oggled. 😀


Chee Kiang presents to you another addition to the already awesome streets of Singapore’s shopping heaven.


Despite going to Orchard many many times now, I still stumble about, not knowing which underground walkways lead to where, which escalator goes to which shopping mall…anyway long story short, suddenly I was in front of a super cute milkshake shop! I think it was at ION?


Choose your size! <3 (actually I love the colours in this pic hence the pic)


Rule of thumb: Whatever that has peanuts and cream probably tastes damn awesome. This one is called Nutty Peanut Butler!


And Chee Kiang had one called Powderful Milonosaurus! So cute right!! Confirm the name came from Milo dinosaur that most of your mamaks carry. 🙂


Previous weekend Daryl+Kim came down and we hung out with Joanne (Daryl’s Sis) and hubby Ser Hon.. and this week another part of the gang came down, Justin+Charlotte. So it’s like a non-stop december weekend thing! Should have brought my camera out last weekend as we went to a whole lot of awesome restaurants!

More of the Sg Christmas deco. 🙂 I want to see more but we always seem to be rushing to somewhere whenever we are in Orchard. :\ Maybe I’ll pop by one evening to just walk walk and photograph, photograph!


Even the display windows are so gorgeous.


Sigh. 🙂


Love this display window too. 😀


All the roads were decked out in these blue lights so everything around you is illuminated in blue. Very avatar. 🙂

Do You Realize Our Generation Is Tying The Knot Earlier?

For the past one year, my facebook feeds have been heading in a different, previously unchartered direction.

Every morning I wake up to shocking (but delightful) news that who and who just got engaged, accompanied by a few hundred likes and an entire page of comments. Months later the pre wedding shoots would follow, resulting in another torrent of likes and comments. Somehow the prewedding photographs make it that little bit more official.

I realized that a lot of those who are getting engaged/married are about around the 1989-1985 age group. Somehow the 1984 are only starting to get married now, them being about 27 seems just about right. A friend echoed my sentiments recently and he, being born in 1984, noticed the trend too.
He also said that those who were born before 1984, seemed to get married at a more conventional age of 27-30.

Only a few years back, when wedding bells were heard, we would nudge each other knowingly, looking forward to a baby to play with soon. And most of the time, we were right. 😉

But now, almost everyone in a relationship for more than two years are tying the knot!

It’s just funny how come those born on or after 1985 are choosing to get married earlier than those who were born before 1985. Another friend mentioned that it could be because those born after 1985 somehow wants to have it all at a young age. Impatient and impulsive. Do you think so?

I know a lot us in this age group need to get married for a variety of reasons. There is the dreaded government posting which a lot of people in the medical and education field have to work around, to secure a preferred state by getting hitched. Sometimes, this method doesn’t even work. Then I hear there are the more religious ones who are getting married because they want to stay together. *shifty eyes*

And then there are those like me, who have been in a really really long relationship. I know of many other couples like that, couples who have grown up with us, as a couple. Also not getting married anytime soon. We have plans, yes. But nothing official. Mainly because we have things to sort out like savings, an idea of where we really really want to be and how are we going to afford a nice wedding. How do people do it? Maybe most of those who are in long term relationships from high school/college are stuck in the mindset that we are still ‘young’. Thus continuously believing that it’s not the right time, we are not done with what what we need as individuals etc etc.

But high school sweethearts aside (most of those that I know who have been together as long as us, are still dating too. Nothing announced.), a lot of the people who are about our age are getting engaged and some have even had their weddings.

I don’t know.. it’s just a little mind boggling for me. Trying quite hard not to be influenced by peer pressure (I can admit it okay! I’m Jolene Lai. Not shy!) and constantly reminding ourselves that when we’re ready, we’re ready because we are. Not because everyone else is. 🙂 Honestly, every single posting that I go to, the nurses there will ask me when am I getting married (once they found out that I’m living in sin). I openly tell people at work that I’m here in JB with my boyfriend and that we’re living together. For some, it’s a foreign concept, a sacrilege! But like being gay, society has to start accepting somehow that there are people doing things differently from their norm.

I know this way of life is pushing it but there were times when I wondered what if I ever get knocked up before tying the knot. Firstly dad will kill me. LOL. But that aside, we all know the direction we are heading to. We are everything but short of a document to be man and wife. Mum once said that if something like that was to happen, then we should fast fast plan for the wedding. I had the craziest idea though – I thought that it would be a good case study for society to observe how it is perfectly okay for an unmarried woman to go around being pregnant and take her own sweet time to plan the wedding and even fit in a slimming program to be svelte before the big day. It would also be so awesome to have the kid around.

Sure, relatives will probably be shocked and flock around to gossip about me. But if more people can do this, why not? It will slowly become normal. Like how shot gun marriages are so normal now. Nothing shocking about it.

Actually, at our age, shot gun marriage is also sort of a blessing because then you’ll have a date to work around instead of not knowing when you want to get hitched.

I know a lot of parents still shake their heads at the idea of their daughter getting knocked up before marriage.

In my opinion, there are only three bad knocked-up scenarios:

1) The kid is still schooling. High school, college or university. All bad. I think I can give some leeway to final year students at uni. Heh.
2) The husband to be is a wifebeater/womanizer/an unambitious sloth living on his future wife’s money
3) The father of the child is not your boyfriend
4) The father of the child doesn’t want to be your boyfriend anymore lol

So for people who are in long term, stable relationships, it is OKAY. I don’t know. Anybody want to pick a bone with me?

Sigh, think I digressed too far. Well. #justsaying.

Anyway, congratulations to all my friends who are getting married this year and next year! 😀